nabasa ko sa FB ko sa "God wants you to know" that if i need inspiration, i have to get out. step on earth, breathe fresh air. since, im in Manila, breathing fresh air is unlikely going to happen so i just went out and enjoyed what Manila has to offer.
i called friends and asked them about their dreams. then, i asked advice from a friend whom i treat as my big sister.
papuntang mall habang nasa jeep, nakaisip ako ng isang story concept. :)
then went to the cinema and bought a ticket- Despicable Me, which wouldn't be shown after an hour so...
i ate at Joey Pepperoni, ordered there cheapest offer- Carbonara, Tuna Panini, and iced tea for 145.00. Yum, yum! i'll go back there, for sure.
then, finally watched the Cinema! :D
after that, i went to my alumni's Basilica, stayed and found peace.
then, went to my alumni's library. sakto nga eh umalis guard kaya nakalusot ko. although, i could enter pa din naman because of my alumni card. that was 6.30 PM
then, i had a half-body massage.
nasa jeep na ako pauwi, and nakaisip ulit ako ng isa pang story concept good for movie.
hindi siya typical love story or family story. individual story siya na a bit of family and love, etc. i want it to be shown sa mainstream. at sana maisulat ko siya ng mabuti.
haha
;]
Looking Forward to This
-FREEDOMM-
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Facebook Notes since July 2010
My Facebook Notes
REVERIE.8
July 26, 2010 12:14 AM
napagtanto ko lang ngayon, ive been denying myself of my sentiments about something that has to do with someone that led to something else.
kaya pala parang nalulungkot ang isang tao ng wala namang dahilan (that's what we want to believe sometimes, that its just nothing). its not a good feeling but what can i do, decisions have been made. im disappointed. ang dali namang sumuko.
this could actually be the right circumstances we must be dealing with. it must be. for why did it happen for no reason at all. this could make him grow as a mature man (as well as i).
its a good thing, i have acknowledged my feelings. at least now, i know what to resolve.
when in the dark, there's always going to be a source of light. its just up to me how to find and eventually follow it and bring myself back out of that gloomy night. God has a perfect plan for us.
this is nothing. eh?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
JULY 26, 12:14AM
REVERIE.7
July 17, 2010 10:51 PM
magaling sa magaling pero kung ang turing walang dating, wala din.
risk it all if you must but never your principle.
madaling mangarap lalo na pag natatanaw mo pa ito sa malayo.
pero pag palapit ka na sa pangarap mo, nasusubok ang katatagan mo- lalo na ang prinsipyo mo.
marami ka pang matututunan, but in the process, never see yourself as incapable because if you do, you'll never strive to do more than you can. be the best you can be and yet knowing that you still don't know it all.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.6
June 27, 2010 1:12 PM
Enough about feelings that are deceiving.
Enough with thoughts that are weakening.
Just enough with the bunch of things i know i can't understand or answer right now.
Let's move on to the things that matter today.
Sometimes, it takes an article or a piece of thought from someone else to realize how petty the things i worry about these past few days. I've been affected by the mere thought of being where i am now. I've been thoughtless.
I am not in a classroom setting anymore where my misgivings could be forgiven or failures could be remedied without much effort.
Nevertheless, this doesn't mean not enjoying the things i love. The position I'm in is what i wanted, in the first place. But i miss my past colleagues and i owe i lot from them. And I'll be forever grateful for the experience and lessons i brought with me when i left their sanctuary. My work before was fun, and i got the chance to meet people i never expected to meet or better yet be friends with. It was splendid, marvelous, and fantastic. You would be overwhelmed and humbled by their personalities amidst their respected and/or glamorous position in their industry. Now, i have to keep in mind these people. I may not be with them anymore, but i know, that my memory of them is enough to help me be the person i wanted to be.
Right now, I'm moving on to the life i wanted and dreamed about. Before, i thought my first job was what i prayed for so i stuck with it. But my first love kept on knocking so i grabbed it in the end. Now, i realized He gave me the first one as a weapon for my dream job. I needed the experience and the inspiration i got from the people from my previous work so i could be equipped and ready with the kind of world of my dream job.
May i always be reminded of this.
Thanks, God.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.5
June 26, 2010 10:51 AM
(2)im not asking for a boyfriend that nags (and just talk) alone.
(1)im asking for a best friend that cares (and does something about it) genuinely.
(2)not this kind of lines:
"i dont want you to do that or this, etc."
(1)this one:
"don't do that. ok, where are you exactly, wait for me. you might need my help."
or
"fine, do what you want, but can i see you after that."
that kind of line.
it would piss me off if i find a guy i want to be (1) but would turn out to be (2).
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.4
June 13, 2010 2:58 AM
boys vs girls 1
'girls don't always mean what they say.
and
boys don't always remember what they said.'
when girls say the opposite of what they really want, that means the boys are being tested.
girls, by nature, want to be pursued. hence, unconsciously or not, they insist on things they would eventually hate when the boys did exactly what they were asked to do.
boys usually take things literally. and because they want to please the girl, they do exactly what they say. (now, maybe, these is where petty quarrels start)
on the other hand, boys are usually foresighted. a sweet gesture would be natural for them , a no-big-deal for someone they care about. they would feel relief of having helped, yes, and of becoming, let's just say, a 'knight in shining armor' but then they'll will move on to the next bigger task.
big things matter for boys.
but
small things would matter to girls.
but girls, they would treasure moments (of gestures, perhaps) with boys longer than you'd expect. sometimes it would serve as their source of strength or affirmation of 'love', to forgive and still 'love' the person or worst, endure the person.
yeah, girls are sentimental.
when they care for someone, they think a lot. they give a lot. they forgive a lot.
But when they were hurt so much, they could set their mind really hard and end up the survivor in the break-up but still love the man, silently. after proving they could survive without the other they would gradually move on, by themselves. but when they really had moved on to someone, its hard getting back to them.
girls are submissive, yes, and soft, but when they really have moved on, they're lethal, mind you.
and boys, i don't know. not really.
FYI: all of these, i just deduced from observations, experience, but mostly from friends' stories.
do you have scenarios like these??
frustrating, eh? how different these two sexes are
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.3
June 7, 2010 6:33 PM
muntik ng mawala pangarap ko.
do i really have to wait for something to be at stake for me to really make up my mind of the things i want to achieve?? to feel threatened to loose something i dream??--to really be SURE of myself??to really prepare myself of the things i must do to achieve it??to DETERMINE myself??
the incident today made me realize that not everything's easy. it also proved,
if you want something so bad, you have to give your all--by that, i meant, more than your best.
PS: Thank you, God. You never left me. thank You for this experience.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.2
June 7, 2010 12:04 AM
there's a right time for everything.
if we let our emotions take charge of our actions, it'll be sweet, and happy but temporarily. giving in to pure emotions wouldn't work out for us because at the moment, our hearts are weak and our mind-sets not ready for a commitment.
i like you, but not today. we'd be together someday. and when that day comes, you'll have me by heart
and by soul.
that's , if we're really meant to be.
wait if you want. still, wait if you can--wait if you must.
but wait patiently, lovingly, accepting and understanding,
until the right time comes.
...naks!(wandering thoughts, eh?)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.1
June 4, 2010 12:00 PM
a person would do the right thing for the right partner.
a man who loves you truly doesn't need instructions of how to win your heart, he just acts in accordance to his feelings.
a man that's good for you, doesn't only loves what he sees, but loves more what he doesn't see in you. he also appreciates the people you treasure. he makes effort, but for him its no effort at all, because he's just loving, its the way it is. no big deal. but looking beyond his actions, you'd feel how he's changing the you see him in the things that he did. you start to appreciate him, and you'll just be thankful for having a man like him.
swell.
hope i experience that.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
death and regrets
November 20, 2009 12:42 AM
...you have seen him, talked with him, but never really tried to have a good long talk thinking there would be next time for that, and because there's still a lot of things to do, more exciting, more thrilling. but, actually, you fear the awkward silence when you don't know any more what to say. you fear the judgment coming if he surmises your clandestine. you fear disappointing him. you fear a lot of things that's why you do nothing to reach him. until its too late.so, you went away.
...now i fear going back not seeing him when i get there.now, i realized no action is already an action for it has its effect too, for no action may mean a lot of things (mostly negative) and thus, result to consequences you might later regret. i ask myself,what else to do? where else to go?i wont fool myself, i already know the answer, obviously.nowhere.he went away, already.
...now, you're left thinking, what have he thought of me? did he knew i love him?did he knew it always makes me welcome and it meant a great deal to me that whenever i visit my father's house he smiles, is concern, and is eager to see me. that he always makes me feel accepted or still belonged to the family even if i seldom go back any more?thou, i want to.'oh please make my troubles away and make him stay', i want to pray.
death could really make you realize how regretful your actions were and it really is burdensome. it is to me.and that's frustrating to know. i just hope lolo died in peace. but what i am grateful about all of this is knowing he wouldn't be missing lola any more. they are on their own now.
but i'm not saying i didn't do nothing at all, i want to believe that... those i did made come true with him,well, may not be the best, but good memories i will be leaving him. i am not fully satisfied, but they're all i've got. and i will treasure all my memories with him.
just some advice using cliches:it is never too late to a person who's living. grab it now or regret later. know you that you love and then act on it. because love is an action on itself. not just a mere thought. well, that's to people who wants their feelings be known and so take some action.
i pray my titas and tito, and other loved ones of lolo will make it through. i know God will make them stronger and be closer to each other. it will.
REVERIE.8
July 26, 2010 12:14 AM
napagtanto ko lang ngayon, ive been denying myself of my sentiments about something that has to do with someone that led to something else.
kaya pala parang nalulungkot ang isang tao ng wala namang dahilan (that's what we want to believe sometimes, that its just nothing). its not a good feeling but what can i do, decisions have been made. im disappointed. ang dali namang sumuko.
this could actually be the right circumstances we must be dealing with. it must be. for why did it happen for no reason at all. this could make him grow as a mature man (as well as i).
its a good thing, i have acknowledged my feelings. at least now, i know what to resolve.
when in the dark, there's always going to be a source of light. its just up to me how to find and eventually follow it and bring myself back out of that gloomy night. God has a perfect plan for us.
this is nothing. eh?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
JULY 26, 12:14AM
REVERIE.7
July 17, 2010 10:51 PM
magaling sa magaling pero kung ang turing walang dating, wala din.
risk it all if you must but never your principle.
madaling mangarap lalo na pag natatanaw mo pa ito sa malayo.
pero pag palapit ka na sa pangarap mo, nasusubok ang katatagan mo- lalo na ang prinsipyo mo.
marami ka pang matututunan, but in the process, never see yourself as incapable because if you do, you'll never strive to do more than you can. be the best you can be and yet knowing that you still don't know it all.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.6
June 27, 2010 1:12 PM
Enough about feelings that are deceiving.
Enough with thoughts that are weakening.
Just enough with the bunch of things i know i can't understand or answer right now.
Let's move on to the things that matter today.
Sometimes, it takes an article or a piece of thought from someone else to realize how petty the things i worry about these past few days. I've been affected by the mere thought of being where i am now. I've been thoughtless.
I am not in a classroom setting anymore where my misgivings could be forgiven or failures could be remedied without much effort.
Nevertheless, this doesn't mean not enjoying the things i love. The position I'm in is what i wanted, in the first place. But i miss my past colleagues and i owe i lot from them. And I'll be forever grateful for the experience and lessons i brought with me when i left their sanctuary. My work before was fun, and i got the chance to meet people i never expected to meet or better yet be friends with. It was splendid, marvelous, and fantastic. You would be overwhelmed and humbled by their personalities amidst their respected and/or glamorous position in their industry. Now, i have to keep in mind these people. I may not be with them anymore, but i know, that my memory of them is enough to help me be the person i wanted to be.
Right now, I'm moving on to the life i wanted and dreamed about. Before, i thought my first job was what i prayed for so i stuck with it. But my first love kept on knocking so i grabbed it in the end. Now, i realized He gave me the first one as a weapon for my dream job. I needed the experience and the inspiration i got from the people from my previous work so i could be equipped and ready with the kind of world of my dream job.
May i always be reminded of this.
Thanks, God.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.5
June 26, 2010 10:51 AM
(2)im not asking for a boyfriend that nags (and just talk) alone.
(1)im asking for a best friend that cares (and does something about it) genuinely.
(2)not this kind of lines:
"i dont want you to do that or this, etc."
(1)this one:
"don't do that. ok, where are you exactly, wait for me. you might need my help."
or
"fine, do what you want, but can i see you after that."
that kind of line.
it would piss me off if i find a guy i want to be (1) but would turn out to be (2).
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.4
June 13, 2010 2:58 AM
boys vs girls 1
'girls don't always mean what they say.
and
boys don't always remember what they said.'
when girls say the opposite of what they really want, that means the boys are being tested.
girls, by nature, want to be pursued. hence, unconsciously or not, they insist on things they would eventually hate when the boys did exactly what they were asked to do.
boys usually take things literally. and because they want to please the girl, they do exactly what they say. (now, maybe, these is where petty quarrels start)
on the other hand, boys are usually foresighted. a sweet gesture would be natural for them , a no-big-deal for someone they care about. they would feel relief of having helped, yes, and of becoming, let's just say, a 'knight in shining armor' but then they'll will move on to the next bigger task.
big things matter for boys.
but
small things would matter to girls.
but girls, they would treasure moments (of gestures, perhaps) with boys longer than you'd expect. sometimes it would serve as their source of strength or affirmation of 'love', to forgive and still 'love' the person or worst, endure the person.
yeah, girls are sentimental.
when they care for someone, they think a lot. they give a lot. they forgive a lot.
But when they were hurt so much, they could set their mind really hard and end up the survivor in the break-up but still love the man, silently. after proving they could survive without the other they would gradually move on, by themselves. but when they really had moved on to someone, its hard getting back to them.
girls are submissive, yes, and soft, but when they really have moved on, they're lethal, mind you.
and boys, i don't know. not really.
FYI: all of these, i just deduced from observations, experience, but mostly from friends' stories.
do you have scenarios like these??
frustrating, eh? how different these two sexes are
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.3
June 7, 2010 6:33 PM
muntik ng mawala pangarap ko.
do i really have to wait for something to be at stake for me to really make up my mind of the things i want to achieve?? to feel threatened to loose something i dream??--to really be SURE of myself??to really prepare myself of the things i must do to achieve it??to DETERMINE myself??
the incident today made me realize that not everything's easy. it also proved,
if you want something so bad, you have to give your all--by that, i meant, more than your best.
PS: Thank you, God. You never left me. thank You for this experience.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.2
June 7, 2010 12:04 AM
there's a right time for everything.
if we let our emotions take charge of our actions, it'll be sweet, and happy but temporarily. giving in to pure emotions wouldn't work out for us because at the moment, our hearts are weak and our mind-sets not ready for a commitment.
i like you, but not today. we'd be together someday. and when that day comes, you'll have me by heart
and by soul.
that's , if we're really meant to be.
wait if you want. still, wait if you can--wait if you must.
but wait patiently, lovingly, accepting and understanding,
until the right time comes.
...naks!(wandering thoughts, eh?)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REVERIE.1
June 4, 2010 12:00 PM
a person would do the right thing for the right partner.
a man who loves you truly doesn't need instructions of how to win your heart, he just acts in accordance to his feelings.
a man that's good for you, doesn't only loves what he sees, but loves more what he doesn't see in you. he also appreciates the people you treasure. he makes effort, but for him its no effort at all, because he's just loving, its the way it is. no big deal. but looking beyond his actions, you'd feel how he's changing the you see him in the things that he did. you start to appreciate him, and you'll just be thankful for having a man like him.
swell.
hope i experience that.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
death and regrets
November 20, 2009 12:42 AM
...you have seen him, talked with him, but never really tried to have a good long talk thinking there would be next time for that, and because there's still a lot of things to do, more exciting, more thrilling. but, actually, you fear the awkward silence when you don't know any more what to say. you fear the judgment coming if he surmises your clandestine. you fear disappointing him. you fear a lot of things that's why you do nothing to reach him. until its too late.so, you went away.
...now i fear going back not seeing him when i get there.now, i realized no action is already an action for it has its effect too, for no action may mean a lot of things (mostly negative) and thus, result to consequences you might later regret. i ask myself,what else to do? where else to go?i wont fool myself, i already know the answer, obviously.nowhere.he went away, already.
...now, you're left thinking, what have he thought of me? did he knew i love him?did he knew it always makes me welcome and it meant a great deal to me that whenever i visit my father's house he smiles, is concern, and is eager to see me. that he always makes me feel accepted or still belonged to the family even if i seldom go back any more?thou, i want to.'oh please make my troubles away and make him stay', i want to pray.
death could really make you realize how regretful your actions were and it really is burdensome. it is to me.and that's frustrating to know. i just hope lolo died in peace. but what i am grateful about all of this is knowing he wouldn't be missing lola any more. they are on their own now.
but i'm not saying i didn't do nothing at all, i want to believe that... those i did made come true with him,well, may not be the best, but good memories i will be leaving him. i am not fully satisfied, but they're all i've got. and i will treasure all my memories with him.
just some advice using cliches:it is never too late to a person who's living. grab it now or regret later. know you that you love and then act on it. because love is an action on itself. not just a mere thought. well, that's to people who wants their feelings be known and so take some action.
i pray my titas and tito, and other loved ones of lolo will make it through. i know God will make them stronger and be closer to each other. it will.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
RANDOM LINES.9
i could never make a perfect decision for myself until i make one. and that perfect decision is not always the 'right' one in the eyes of majority but what the heck, at least i made a choice to make a seemingly wrong decision into a perfect one.just for me.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
yes, believe, but.
i didn't know that i don't know how to write. just amazing, right?
nah. i knew.
well, writing the proper way. one thing about righting on your OWN blog is you OWN it. therefore, you only have rules that is convenient for you.
anyway, it is disheartening.
and i didn't know i was becoming someone i don't want to be.
they tell me i am too confident. and i was thinking and reasoning, i'm confident for i believe God has in stored greater things for me.that is right. but in the process, i failed myself.
How could i believe in God's greater plan for me, when i don't believe in myself?
i fantasied being great and successful but when reality asks something from me, i cower and produce something not so great.
i feared and then thought of giving up thinking 'maybe i am up to lesser things in this world'. i am so ready going back to my comfort zone. i am creating reasons why i should give up untarnished. but who am i kidding?
really, humility is important not just because it is a value every mother would advice you to have. but the thing is, humility would always question yourself if you are doing the right things and make even the smallest deal worthy of your gratefulness and care. these things would make you a great person.
speaking of greatness, being great is not surmountable to quantity of life, you know. its always the quality or your way of living. but not how luxurious you live your life but how blessed you feel, how content you are, how you find joy in every small thing you do, and how productive and helpful are your relationships.
greatness inside is way more valuable than greatness outside. God wants us to believe in ourselves, to be proud of ourselves and not just depend solely in Him. He will be there, that's unquestionable but be someone deserving of that much attention and care.
and so, MOVE.
nah. i knew.
well, writing the proper way. one thing about righting on your OWN blog is you OWN it. therefore, you only have rules that is convenient for you.
anyway, it is disheartening.
and i didn't know i was becoming someone i don't want to be.
they tell me i am too confident. and i was thinking and reasoning, i'm confident for i believe God has in stored greater things for me.that is right. but in the process, i failed myself.
How could i believe in God's greater plan for me, when i don't believe in myself?
i fantasied being great and successful but when reality asks something from me, i cower and produce something not so great.
i feared and then thought of giving up thinking 'maybe i am up to lesser things in this world'. i am so ready going back to my comfort zone. i am creating reasons why i should give up untarnished. but who am i kidding?
really, humility is important not just because it is a value every mother would advice you to have. but the thing is, humility would always question yourself if you are doing the right things and make even the smallest deal worthy of your gratefulness and care. these things would make you a great person.
speaking of greatness, being great is not surmountable to quantity of life, you know. its always the quality or your way of living. but not how luxurious you live your life but how blessed you feel, how content you are, how you find joy in every small thing you do, and how productive and helpful are your relationships.
greatness inside is way more valuable than greatness outside. God wants us to believe in ourselves, to be proud of ourselves and not just depend solely in Him. He will be there, that's unquestionable but be someone deserving of that much attention and care.
and so, MOVE.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
""the disease she had is, you see, universal. -sherwood anderson
"the disease she had is, you see, universal. we all want to be loved and
the world has no plan for creating our lovers..."
"she needed a lover and at the same time a lover was not what she needed. The need of a lover was, after all, a quite secondary thing. She needed to be loved, to be long and quietly and patiently loved."
Sherwood Anderson is right.
i feel the same.
-------
i don't like being weak. ang maging talunan at bitter sa buhay at sa mga taong naka-disappoint sa akin because they did not make it to my expectations of them.
this disappointment has something to do with me, of them not being able to take hold of me. it gives me low self esteem knowing no one was patient and all ended up giving up.
"By being sure of yourself you are in danger of losing all of the romance of life."
but i don;t know myself...anmymore... or never had.
and, alright i don't want to take a risk because i'm afraid of having a wrong choice. but does it have to have a choice??
i'm afraid to feel so much love and happiness and then be left behind by that same person.
i have to be find love for and in myself first............
i believe. crap..
the world has no plan for creating our lovers..."
"she needed a lover and at the same time a lover was not what she needed. The need of a lover was, after all, a quite secondary thing. She needed to be loved, to be long and quietly and patiently loved."
Sherwood Anderson is right.
i feel the same.
-------
i don't like being weak. ang maging talunan at bitter sa buhay at sa mga taong naka-disappoint sa akin because they did not make it to my expectations of them.
this disappointment has something to do with me, of them not being able to take hold of me. it gives me low self esteem knowing no one was patient and all ended up giving up.
"By being sure of yourself you are in danger of losing all of the romance of life."
but i don;t know myself...anmymore... or never had.
and, alright i don't want to take a risk because i'm afraid of having a wrong choice. but does it have to have a choice??
i'm afraid to feel so much love and happiness and then be left behind by that same person.
i have to be find love for and in myself first............
i believe. crap..
Monday, July 5, 2010
RANDOM LINES1
don't ever forget that you are not alone in this world.
hindi kalabisan ang sabihin ang nais mong ipaintindi kung alam mo naman sa sarili mong kelangang may makarinig ng opinyon mo.
i am easily intimidated.
even before speaking, my filters would kick in and i'd be left just accepting truths of other people. sometimes, i would understand immediately what they want to tell me or at times i'd be much convinced of that person's mistakes or misconception.
today, i will wallow with sorrow. tomorrow, i will let myself grow. i need to glow. and i must grow
hindi kalabisan ang sabihin ang nais mong ipaintindi kung alam mo naman sa sarili mong kelangang may makarinig ng opinyon mo.
i am easily intimidated.
even before speaking, my filters would kick in and i'd be left just accepting truths of other people. sometimes, i would understand immediately what they want to tell me or at times i'd be much convinced of that person's mistakes or misconception.
today, i will wallow with sorrow. tomorrow, i will let myself grow. i need to glow. and i must grow
Sunday, June 27, 2010
REVERIE.6
Enough about feelings that are deceiving.
Enough with thoughts that are weakening.
Just enough with the bunch of things i know i can't understand or answer right now.
Let's move on to the things that matter today.
Sometimes, it takes an article or a piece of thought from someone else to realize how petty the things i worry about these past few days. I've been affected by the mere thought of being where i am now. I've been thoughtless.
I am not in a classroom setting anymore where my misgivings could be forgiven or failures could be remedied without much effort.
Nevertheless, this doesn't mean not enjoying the things i love. The position I'm in is what i wanted, in the first place. But i miss my past colleagues and i owe i lot from them. And I'll be forever grateful for the experience and lessons i brought with me when i left their sanctuary. My work before was fun, and i got the chance to meet people i never expected to meet or better yet be friends with. It was splendid, marvelous, and fantastic. You would be overwhelmed and humbled by their personalities amidst their respected and/or glamorous position in their industry. Now, i have to keep in mind these people. I may not be with them anymore, but i know, that my memory of them is enough to help me be the person i wanted to be.
Right now, I'm moving on to the life i wanted and dreamed about. Before, i thought my first job was what i prayed for so i stuck with it. But my first love kept on knocking so i grabbed it in the end. Now, i realized He gave me the first one as a weapon for my dream job. I needed the experience and the inspiration i got from the people from my previous work so i could be equipped and ready with the kind of world of my dream job.
May i always be reminded of this.
Thanks, God.
Enough with thoughts that are weakening.
Just enough with the bunch of things i know i can't understand or answer right now.
Let's move on to the things that matter today.
Sometimes, it takes an article or a piece of thought from someone else to realize how petty the things i worry about these past few days. I've been affected by the mere thought of being where i am now. I've been thoughtless.
I am not in a classroom setting anymore where my misgivings could be forgiven or failures could be remedied without much effort.
Nevertheless, this doesn't mean not enjoying the things i love. The position I'm in is what i wanted, in the first place. But i miss my past colleagues and i owe i lot from them. And I'll be forever grateful for the experience and lessons i brought with me when i left their sanctuary. My work before was fun, and i got the chance to meet people i never expected to meet or better yet be friends with. It was splendid, marvelous, and fantastic. You would be overwhelmed and humbled by their personalities amidst their respected and/or glamorous position in their industry. Now, i have to keep in mind these people. I may not be with them anymore, but i know, that my memory of them is enough to help me be the person i wanted to be.
Right now, I'm moving on to the life i wanted and dreamed about. Before, i thought my first job was what i prayed for so i stuck with it. But my first love kept on knocking so i grabbed it in the end. Now, i realized He gave me the first one as a weapon for my dream job. I needed the experience and the inspiration i got from the people from my previous work so i could be equipped and ready with the kind of world of my dream job.
May i always be reminded of this.
Thanks, God.
REVERIE.5
(2)im not asking for a boyfriend that nags (and just talk) alone.
(1)im asking for a best friend that cares (and does something about it) genuinely.
(2)not this kind of lines:
"i dont want you to do that or this, etc."
(1)this one:
"don't do that. ok, where are you exactly, wait for me. you might need my help."
or
"fine, do what you want, but can i see you after that."
that kind of line.
it would piss me off if i find a guy i want to be (1) but would turn out to be (2).
(1)im asking for a best friend that cares (and does something about it) genuinely.
(2)not this kind of lines:
"i dont want you to do that or this, etc."
(1)this one:
"don't do that. ok, where are you exactly, wait for me. you might need my help."
or
"fine, do what you want, but can i see you after that."
that kind of line.
it would piss me off if i find a guy i want to be (1) but would turn out to be (2).
Saturday, June 12, 2010
REVERIE.4
boys vs girls 1
'girls don't always mean what they say.
and
boys don't always remember what they said.'
when girls say the opposite of what they really want, that means the boys are being tested.
girls, by nature, want to be pursued. hence, unconsciously or not, they insist on things they would eventually hate when the boys did exactly what they were asked to do.
boys usually take things literally. and because they want to please the girl, they do exactly what they say. (now, maybe, these is where petty quarrels start)
on the other hand, boys are usually foresighted. a sweet gesture would be natural for them , a no-big-deal for someone they care about. they would feel relief of having helped, yes, and of becoming, let's just say, a 'knight in shining armor' but then they'll will move on to the next bigger task.
big things matter for boys.
but
small things would matter to girls.
but girls, they would treasure moments (of gestures, perhaps) with boys longer than you'd expect. sometimes it would serve as their source of strength or affirmation of 'love', to forgive and still 'love' the person or worst, endure the person.
yeah, girls are sentimental.
when they care for someone, they think a lot. they give a lot. they forgive a lot.
But when they were hurt so much, they could set their mind really hard and end up the survivor in the break-up but still love the man, silently. after proving they could survive without the other they would gradually move on, by themselves. but when they really had moved on to someone, its hard getting back to them.
girls are submissive, yes, and soft, but when they really have moved on, they're lethal, mind you.
and boys, i don't know. not really.
FYI: all of these, i just deduced from observations, experience, but mostly from friends' stories.
do you have scenarios like these??
frustrating, eh? how different these two sexes are
'girls don't always mean what they say.
and
boys don't always remember what they said.'
when girls say the opposite of what they really want, that means the boys are being tested.
girls, by nature, want to be pursued. hence, unconsciously or not, they insist on things they would eventually hate when the boys did exactly what they were asked to do.
boys usually take things literally. and because they want to please the girl, they do exactly what they say. (now, maybe, these is where petty quarrels start)
on the other hand, boys are usually foresighted. a sweet gesture would be natural for them , a no-big-deal for someone they care about. they would feel relief of having helped, yes, and of becoming, let's just say, a 'knight in shining armor' but then they'll will move on to the next bigger task.
big things matter for boys.
but
small things would matter to girls.
but girls, they would treasure moments (of gestures, perhaps) with boys longer than you'd expect. sometimes it would serve as their source of strength or affirmation of 'love', to forgive and still 'love' the person or worst, endure the person.
yeah, girls are sentimental.
when they care for someone, they think a lot. they give a lot. they forgive a lot.
But when they were hurt so much, they could set their mind really hard and end up the survivor in the break-up but still love the man, silently. after proving they could survive without the other they would gradually move on, by themselves. but when they really had moved on to someone, its hard getting back to them.
girls are submissive, yes, and soft, but when they really have moved on, they're lethal, mind you.
and boys, i don't know. not really.
FYI: all of these, i just deduced from observations, experience, but mostly from friends' stories.
do you have scenarios like these??
frustrating, eh? how different these two sexes are
Monday, June 7, 2010
REVERIE.3
Today at 10:51am | Edit Note | Delete
(2)im not asking for a boyfriend that nags (and just talk) alone.
(1)im asking for a best friend that cares (and does something about it) genuinely.
(2)not this kind of lines:
"i dont want you to do that or this, etc."
(1)this one:
"don't do that. ok, where are you exactly, wait for me. you might need my help."
or
"fine, do what you want, but can i see you after that."
that kind of line.
it would piss me off if i find a guy i want to be (1) but would turn out to be (2).
Updated 11 hours ago · Comment · LikeUnlike
Write a comment...
REVERIE.4
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Sunday, June 13, 2010 at 2:58am | Edit Note | Delete
boys vs girls 1
'girls don't always mean what they say.
and
boys don't always remember what they said.'
when girls say the opposite of what they really want, that means the boys are being tested.
girls, by nature, want to be pursued. hence, unconsciously or not, they insist on things they would eventually hate when the boys did exactly what they were asked to do.
boys usually take things literally. and because they want to please the girl, they do exactly what they say. (now, maybe, these is where petty quarrels start)
on the other hand, boys are usually foresighted. a sweet gesture would be natural for them , a no-big-deal for someone they care about. they would feel relief of having helped, yes, and of becoming, let's just say, a 'knight in shining armor' but then they'll will move on to the next bigger task.
big things matter for boys.
but
small things would matter to girls.
but girls, they would treasure moments (of gestures, perhaps) with boys longer than you'd expect. sometimes it would serve as their source of strength or affirmation of 'love', to forgive and still 'love' the person or worst, endure the person.
yeah, girls are sentimental.
when they care for someone, they think a lot. they give a lot. they forgive a lot.
But when they were hurt so much, they could set their mind really hard and end up the survivor in the break-up but still love the man, silently. after proving they could survive without the other they would gradually move on, by themselves. but when they really had moved on to someone, its hard getting back to them.
girls are submissive, yes, and soft, but when they really have moved on, they're lethal, mind you.
and boys, i don't know. not really.
FYI: all of these, i just deduced from observations, experience, but mostly from friends' stories.
do you have scenarios like these??
frustrating, eh? how different these two sexes are
got this from FB: Definitely Filipino
Written about a week ago · Comment · LikeUnlike
Write a comment...
REVERIE.3
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Monday, June 7, 2010 at 6:33pm | Edit Note | Delete
muntik ng mawala pangarap ko.
do i really have to wait for something to be at stake for me to really make up my mind of the things i want to achieve?? to feel threatened to loose something i dream??--to really be SURE of myself??to really prepare myself of the things i must do to achieve it??to DETERMINE myself??
the incident today made me realize that not everything's easy. it also proved,
if you want something so bad, you have to give your all--by that, i meant, more than your best.
PS: Thank you, God. You never left me. thank You for this experience.
(2)im not asking for a boyfriend that nags (and just talk) alone.
(1)im asking for a best friend that cares (and does something about it) genuinely.
(2)not this kind of lines:
"i dont want you to do that or this, etc."
(1)this one:
"don't do that. ok, where are you exactly, wait for me. you might need my help."
or
"fine, do what you want, but can i see you after that."
that kind of line.
it would piss me off if i find a guy i want to be (1) but would turn out to be (2).
Updated 11 hours ago · Comment · LikeUnlike
Write a comment...
REVERIE.4
Share
Sunday, June 13, 2010 at 2:58am | Edit Note | Delete
boys vs girls 1
'girls don't always mean what they say.
and
boys don't always remember what they said.'
when girls say the opposite of what they really want, that means the boys are being tested.
girls, by nature, want to be pursued. hence, unconsciously or not, they insist on things they would eventually hate when the boys did exactly what they were asked to do.
boys usually take things literally. and because they want to please the girl, they do exactly what they say. (now, maybe, these is where petty quarrels start)
on the other hand, boys are usually foresighted. a sweet gesture would be natural for them , a no-big-deal for someone they care about. they would feel relief of having helped, yes, and of becoming, let's just say, a 'knight in shining armor' but then they'll will move on to the next bigger task.
big things matter for boys.
but
small things would matter to girls.
but girls, they would treasure moments (of gestures, perhaps) with boys longer than you'd expect. sometimes it would serve as their source of strength or affirmation of 'love', to forgive and still 'love' the person or worst, endure the person.
yeah, girls are sentimental.
when they care for someone, they think a lot. they give a lot. they forgive a lot.
But when they were hurt so much, they could set their mind really hard and end up the survivor in the break-up but still love the man, silently. after proving they could survive without the other they would gradually move on, by themselves. but when they really had moved on to someone, its hard getting back to them.
girls are submissive, yes, and soft, but when they really have moved on, they're lethal, mind you.
and boys, i don't know. not really.
FYI: all of these, i just deduced from observations, experience, but mostly from friends' stories.
do you have scenarios like these??
frustrating, eh? how different these two sexes are
got this from FB: Definitely Filipino
Written about a week ago · Comment · LikeUnlike
Write a comment...
REVERIE.3
Share
Monday, June 7, 2010 at 6:33pm | Edit Note | Delete
muntik ng mawala pangarap ko.
do i really have to wait for something to be at stake for me to really make up my mind of the things i want to achieve?? to feel threatened to loose something i dream??--to really be SURE of myself??to really prepare myself of the things i must do to achieve it??to DETERMINE myself??
the incident today made me realize that not everything's easy. it also proved,
if you want something so bad, you have to give your all--by that, i meant, more than your best.
PS: Thank you, God. You never left me. thank You for this experience.
REVERIE.2
REVERIE.2
Share
Monday, June 7, 2010 at 12:04am | Edit Note | Delete
there's a right time for everything.
if we let our emotions take charge of our actions, it'll be sweet, and happy but temporarily. giving in to pure emotions wouldn't work out for us because at the moment, our hearts are weak and our mind-sets not ready for a commitment.
i like you, but not today. we'd be together someday. and when that day comes, you'll have me by heart
and by soul.
that's , if we're really meant to be.
wait if you want. still, wait if you can--wait if you must.
but wait patiently, lovingly, accepting and understanding,
until the right time comes.
...naks!(wandering thoughts, eh?)
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Monday, June 7, 2010 at 12:04am | Edit Note | Delete
there's a right time for everything.
if we let our emotions take charge of our actions, it'll be sweet, and happy but temporarily. giving in to pure emotions wouldn't work out for us because at the moment, our hearts are weak and our mind-sets not ready for a commitment.
i like you, but not today. we'd be together someday. and when that day comes, you'll have me by heart
and by soul.
that's , if we're really meant to be.
wait if you want. still, wait if you can--wait if you must.
but wait patiently, lovingly, accepting and understanding,
until the right time comes.
...naks!(wandering thoughts, eh?)
Friday, June 4, 2010
REVERIE.1
REVERIE.1
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Friday, June 4, 2010 at 12:00pm | Edit Note | Delete
a person would do the right thing for the right partner.
a man who loves you truly doesn't need instructions of how to win your heart, he just acts in accordance to his feelings.
a man that's good for you, doesn't only loves what he sees, but loves more what he doesn't see in you. he also appreciates the people you treasure. he makes effort, but for him its no effort at all, because he's just loving, its the way it is. no big deal. but looking beyond his actions, you'd feel how he's changing the you see him in the things that he did. you start to appreciate him, and you'll just be thankful for having a man like him.
swell.
hope i experience that.
Share
Friday, June 4, 2010 at 12:00pm | Edit Note | Delete
a person would do the right thing for the right partner.
a man who loves you truly doesn't need instructions of how to win your heart, he just acts in accordance to his feelings.
a man that's good for you, doesn't only loves what he sees, but loves more what he doesn't see in you. he also appreciates the people you treasure. he makes effort, but for him its no effort at all, because he's just loving, its the way it is. no big deal. but looking beyond his actions, you'd feel how he's changing the you see him in the things that he did. you start to appreciate him, and you'll just be thankful for having a man like him.
swell.
hope i experience that.
Friday, May 21, 2010
love's so demanding
May 18, 2010 was the date he told me about his feelings. he confessed, finally, that he loves me. i couldn't look at him, i kept asking questions, clarifying things my instinct told me before . most are true.
im the type of person who doesnt sit still when gray areas are present in any kind of relationship of mine.
but when i heard him say he loves me-a confirmation to my instinct, i didnt know exactly how to react and deal with the situation.
im not yet telling him exactly what i feel for him. but, i think he knows i care for him and we have the same feelings for each other.
i told him im afraid because the emotions im feeling at present are new to me and im not quite sure how ill handle it.
the next day he told me, he couldnt respond well to my answer that time because he feels the same way too.
we're both new to the things we're feeling.
__
they tell me im shy.prim and proper type of girl and warned me these kind og girls have wildness inside of them. they're the one who gets pregnant earlier than their classmates.
i have a strong principle of staying a virgin until i get married. but then, im easily see prospects out of guys i meet that qualify my ideal standards (but they're temporary, they last long enough for me to realize its not love im feeling or anything and just plain crush.
but what if i wouldnt be able to control my feelings when im in love and act fool as most in love persons do/act.
i dont like couples who displays their affection publicly. but i like it when he holds my hand and caress it.
i dont like it when i miss him or think abut him numerously in just a day.
i dont like it when he doesnt assure me he loves me.
i dont like it when im liking his attention in me.
i dont like it that i still like him even if see things improper (manners) on him.
but there, i accept those things.
what if i become a fool
what if i get hurt too much
why cant i believe someone could/would really love me, tha i actually have a partner in life just for me>??
im the type of person who doesnt sit still when gray areas are present in any kind of relationship of mine.
but when i heard him say he loves me-a confirmation to my instinct, i didnt know exactly how to react and deal with the situation.
im not yet telling him exactly what i feel for him. but, i think he knows i care for him and we have the same feelings for each other.
i told him im afraid because the emotions im feeling at present are new to me and im not quite sure how ill handle it.
the next day he told me, he couldnt respond well to my answer that time because he feels the same way too.
we're both new to the things we're feeling.
__
they tell me im shy.prim and proper type of girl and warned me these kind og girls have wildness inside of them. they're the one who gets pregnant earlier than their classmates.
i have a strong principle of staying a virgin until i get married. but then, im easily see prospects out of guys i meet that qualify my ideal standards (but they're temporary, they last long enough for me to realize its not love im feeling or anything and just plain crush.
but what if i wouldnt be able to control my feelings when im in love and act fool as most in love persons do/act.
i dont like couples who displays their affection publicly. but i like it when he holds my hand and caress it.
i dont like it when i miss him or think abut him numerously in just a day.
i dont like it when he doesnt assure me he loves me.
i dont like it when im liking his attention in me.
i dont like it that i still like him even if see things improper (manners) on him.
but there, i accept those things.
what if i become a fool
what if i get hurt too much
why cant i believe someone could/would really love me, tha i actually have a partner in life just for me>??
Friday, April 16, 2010
...just following the trails of mind
dumatng ka na ba sa point where you felt you needed someone desperately.
i think you come to that point because you feel you're tired and for once you want someone to take care of you this time as you have been busy taking care of other people lately.
i long for someone i could talk to, someone to share my troubled, unmasked thoughts and crazy ideas. to have some fun with someone you know will protect and take care of you. someone who is....
i read in oprah's website about the magic of making list of things you want to have and so im inspired of making one. by the way, i did the same thing, i made a list of somethinge i want for a job but not written on a list but prayed to God and it worked. sometimes, the line "be careful what you wish for" flashes in my mind and it makes me really cautious of what to want or how i want to have something next. God has a way of directing us into his perfect destination that's right for us. and add that to our sometimes misguided will, we end up going to that destination the hardest way. but, anyway, we have different definition of 'hard' or ' hardest' that is.
im gonna make one soon,;)
a checklist of the right/perfect partner for me!
since i belong to the "no boyfriend since birth" society, figured my list would be idealistic but hope not. i sure want to have or toput some sense to it.hehe
;D
i think you come to that point because you feel you're tired and for once you want someone to take care of you this time as you have been busy taking care of other people lately.
i long for someone i could talk to, someone to share my troubled, unmasked thoughts and crazy ideas. to have some fun with someone you know will protect and take care of you. someone who is....
i read in oprah's website about the magic of making list of things you want to have and so im inspired of making one. by the way, i did the same thing, i made a list of somethinge i want for a job but not written on a list but prayed to God and it worked. sometimes, the line "be careful what you wish for" flashes in my mind and it makes me really cautious of what to want or how i want to have something next. God has a way of directing us into his perfect destination that's right for us. and add that to our sometimes misguided will, we end up going to that destination the hardest way. but, anyway, we have different definition of 'hard' or ' hardest' that is.
im gonna make one soon,;)
a checklist of the right/perfect partner for me!
since i belong to the "no boyfriend since birth" society, figured my list would be idealistic but hope not. i sure want to have or toput some sense to it.hehe
;D
Friday, March 5, 2010
I prayed for...
i prayed to God that i be surrounded by good influential people.
i am.
the people i'm working with are Christians and they are helping me grow.
i pray, that we believe in the same God who created us all.
one of them told me we have the Holy Spirit within us. which makes us more powerful than bad spirits. my tita said we only have believe and claim it.
--
i believe God talks to me by means of His creations and the things around me.
i am afraid this peacefulness or feeling of just perfection and being connected with God end.
.breathe. my ultimate enemy is myself. so, i am afraid of myself being strayed to the wrong direction, wrong thoughts, etc. but i shouldn't.
i love Him. He loves me. so, i have nothing to worry.
"Psalms 27:1 The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?"
i am.
the people i'm working with are Christians and they are helping me grow.
i pray, that we believe in the same God who created us all.
one of them told me we have the Holy Spirit within us. which makes us more powerful than bad spirits. my tita said we only have believe and claim it.
--
i believe God talks to me by means of His creations and the things around me.
i am afraid this peacefulness or feeling of just perfection and being connected with God end.
.breathe. my ultimate enemy is myself. so, i am afraid of myself being strayed to the wrong direction, wrong thoughts, etc. but i shouldn't.
i love Him. He loves me. so, i have nothing to worry.
"Psalms 27:1 The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?"
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Countless Blessings 1
Feb 28, 2010
Fact:
.i'm an RM trainee
.my supervisor gave me an assignment today to be an RM to a new artist (blossoming artist at pinas)
. i wasn;t informed of all the details needed
.i assumed my artist knew what his schedule (he has the contact)
.turned out he didn't know everything, he neede an RM
.Now, i realized 'knowing' is my job where good performace is concerned.
My enemy:
.shyness
.pride
BUT
.i was blessed
GOD,
Thank You for...
speaking to me through a pocketbook (a gift from a cousin) with bible verses and it just happened that i flipped to a page i very much could relate it felt like you talked to me and sent me a message.
proverbs 26:10 TLB
AND one more,
while i was taking note of my feelings, i suddenly wrote..."God is watching over me.:) U shud be glad."
realization hit me, i spoke those words and everything was fine since then.
my only enemy was myself not listening for encouragement, not noticing His lending hand.
Once again, Thank You God, for
the courage to speak and inquire (it helped me a lot with my job this day)
;D
Fact:
.i'm an RM trainee
.my supervisor gave me an assignment today to be an RM to a new artist (blossoming artist at pinas)
. i wasn;t informed of all the details needed
.i assumed my artist knew what his schedule (he has the contact)
.turned out he didn't know everything, he neede an RM
.Now, i realized 'knowing' is my job where good performace is concerned.
My enemy:
.shyness
.pride
BUT
.i was blessed
GOD,
Thank You for...
speaking to me through a pocketbook (a gift from a cousin) with bible verses and it just happened that i flipped to a page i very much could relate it felt like you talked to me and sent me a message.
proverbs 26:10 TLB
AND one more,
while i was taking note of my feelings, i suddenly wrote..."God is watching over me.:) U shud be glad."
realization hit me, i spoke those words and everything was fine since then.
my only enemy was myself not listening for encouragement, not noticing His lending hand.
Once again, Thank You God, for
the courage to speak and inquire (it helped me a lot with my job this day)
;D
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Frustrating Clashes of Classes
i have been referred to a job when i was enjoying my OJT at ABS-CBN. since, it was an opportunity, i grabbed it. and not just that, it would give me the raveling i want and exercise my social skills (a weakness i have to develop). i am truly blessed. there are doors opened for you to enter and stay for it will complete your needs, it would give you happiness and satisfaction. but then, there are also doors opened for you to enter and leave with experience and more knowledge. that's what i believe i am learning now.
opportunities from my 1st OJT are coming too. which makes me a bit more confused, and its maddening how to manage all things at the same time. i know, i have to choose. this is really frustrating!
okay, here's what i would do, 1. give my best at my present OJT and see if it would fit me. 2. before i do that i have to not let myself feel inferior (i have to deal with peole way out of my league, their class is higher than mine. i belong to a middle class/ OFW family. they belong to the rich class of the society. now maybe, that's the whole point here. i'm intimidated and insecure by them. i can't or am having a hard time butting in conversations. and cracking jokes. (harhar, would they even laugh if i tried,ha.ha.)
i really have to deal things with myself first. come one, me! i have to conquer my fears. i have to be me. i have to do something or else i wouldn't be able to do my job well. and i hate it when i'm not doing something i should. or worst want to do something but have no idea what!
ok, time to face the world again. have to go. you can do this, me!
opportunities from my 1st OJT are coming too. which makes me a bit more confused, and its maddening how to manage all things at the same time. i know, i have to choose. this is really frustrating!
okay, here's what i would do, 1. give my best at my present OJT and see if it would fit me. 2. before i do that i have to not let myself feel inferior (i have to deal with peole way out of my league, their class is higher than mine. i belong to a middle class/ OFW family. they belong to the rich class of the society. now maybe, that's the whole point here. i'm intimidated and insecure by them. i can't or am having a hard time butting in conversations. and cracking jokes. (harhar, would they even laugh if i tried,ha.ha.)
i really have to deal things with myself first. come one, me! i have to conquer my fears. i have to be me. i have to do something or else i wouldn't be able to do my job well. and i hate it when i'm not doing something i should. or worst want to do something but have no idea what!
ok, time to face the world again. have to go. you can do this, me!
Monday, February 15, 2010
before books, i am beautiful
i love books, been buying them since i started reading bible stories and discovered pocketbooks. it keeps me away from thinking too seriously. i was a very sensitive and emotional child. i am hoping now i am an 'perfectly okay' sensitive type of gal and emotionally balanced. anyway, books make me happy, fulfilled, transformed. and my love for them gave me an image of being a 'nerd' in school. it suddenly made me a leader, an confidante, an adviser. moreover, buying books made me feel secure, it also gives me pleasure.
then, i've become busier, with a lot of responsibilities and opportunities to excel on my pending career, i am forced to seize buying books, thinking it's only proper for i still have books unread and the lack of time to read them made it more convincing i should set aside my affair with books.
But now, my boss wants me to look presentable for the image of the company! for most of the girls out there that's a no-problem! but what the heck to i care for clothes! okay...that's a lie. i have always been concerned for what i look and unconfident with what i wear and insecure at my hour glass vigure/chubbiness(mostly). that's why i quit trying to look good and just contented myself with the 'okay' look.
Now, i really have to get serious with how i look. i now have to buy clothes and make-up instead of spending money on books alone. i never had fun buying clothes, for fear i'd choose the wrong one which could only leave me to regret how much money i spent that i could''ve used for books.
i am afraid this transformation would break me, i mean i can't handle the pressure of being 'pretty' all the time. of being called 'maarte'. well, yeah, i am becoming biased now.
its so hard being a girl: its too expensive and sacrificial!
why do i have to wear heels if it could only hurt my feet??
why would i wear short skirts if it oculd only make me feel uncomfortable??
why??--for so many things. why can't we just keep it simple.
my advocacy is to be accepted as who you are.
But maturity comes to all of us, i guess.
then, i've become busier, with a lot of responsibilities and opportunities to excel on my pending career, i am forced to seize buying books, thinking it's only proper for i still have books unread and the lack of time to read them made it more convincing i should set aside my affair with books.
But now, my boss wants me to look presentable for the image of the company! for most of the girls out there that's a no-problem! but what the heck to i care for clothes! okay...that's a lie. i have always been concerned for what i look and unconfident with what i wear and insecure at my hour glass vigure/chubbiness(mostly). that's why i quit trying to look good and just contented myself with the 'okay' look.
Now, i really have to get serious with how i look. i now have to buy clothes and make-up instead of spending money on books alone. i never had fun buying clothes, for fear i'd choose the wrong one which could only leave me to regret how much money i spent that i could''ve used for books.
i am afraid this transformation would break me, i mean i can't handle the pressure of being 'pretty' all the time. of being called 'maarte'. well, yeah, i am becoming biased now.
its so hard being a girl: its too expensive and sacrificial!
why do i have to wear heels if it could only hurt my feet??
why would i wear short skirts if it oculd only make me feel uncomfortable??
why??--for so many things. why can't we just keep it simple.
my advocacy is to be accepted as who you are.
But maturity comes to all of us, i guess.
i have to have an investment on clothes and make-up, now i have to set aside my love of buying books.i'm anxious of this change,im worried of the outcome of this change.
But then "i have to be prepared for the rain" (facing the giants).
"TO GOD BE THE GLORY."
i will let myself be the image of my Wonderful Lord, to exude confidence because i am created with the image and likeness of His Being.
i love you, GOD!
I AM BEAUTIFUL. I WILL STAY THAT WAY TO GLORIFY HOW WONDERFULLY YOU MADE ME.
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